Slowly picking up

The year is almost over.

For the last few months things were very uncertain at work. Management changes, work plan changes, and i have even heard a rumour about my being 'on the list' of people deemed redundant. Really there isnt much that I can do and when if it really happens i will just have to accept it.

I'm pretty pleased with my apartment. Just having a place to relax, cook my food on weekends, watched dvd's on the flatscreen and surf the net in private is enough make me feel close to bliss.

I still need to change my car, but with all these uncertainties at work i just do not dare. Only when i get a new car - that volvo S40 looks tempting - will i consider myself to be standing again.

One thing that sometimes bug me considerably is the loneliness, and anxiety about not having found anyone. My fear, and this horrifying vision I had when i was younger - of being 35 and still sitting alone playing my guitar is very, very close to becoming a reality.

The year had been hard, uncertain and lonely but at least I managed to crawl out of my shit. I feel things are picking up, but this job uncertainties threatens to unravel all this development.