A new car? Maybe not

Good golly..what a headache..

I’d been dreaming of this car the Volvo s40 for a while now. Really dreamt about driving it at night, a few times. Went to all the showrooms available in town and beyond, and tested drive it so many times it was beginning to feel like my own car.



Finally decided to purchase on with conditions : 3-year free service, 5-year warranty and a RM5000 discount. Got my cheque book out, went to the dealership one fine morning and was served by a very pleasant, sexy even (although middle-aged) lady. My conditions were met, I even got my preferred number and I was prepared to sign on the cheque.

I had spent half a day at the dealership, but then the registration number booking procedure took a while. I excused myself to get lunch but however went home and started getting extremely racked with doubts.

I have a car, already! Though it isn’t the nicest car to drive its functional. I have all the money, but why would I want to buy another piece of depreciating metal? 7 or 9 years of commitment? But wait a minute, I can’t go on driving this junk! It would mean no social life, no dates! But it frees me of financial worries.
But my job is unstable. I might even get a pay cut. I might be terminated. Or I might want to leave and seek opportunities overseas, or do my MBA.
I have bought another house this year. Now, a luxury car? God can’t be that kind to me!

I suppose, again, when it comes to spending money i am extremely stingy - fearful of going through shits that i went through before, and horrified at the thoughts of parting with what i had so painfully amass.

The most ridiculous episode of having a cold feet that has ever happened. I don’t remember ever being in such a confused state of indecision. This went on for two days (the duration of the promotion), before I had to concede defeat and decided not to commit.

Driving that junk ? with the broken power window? I’m still reeling from this... at the same time feeling ashamed of my indecisiveness.